Celebrating 25 years of motherhood , Day 6 - The look!
Day 6 , the LOOK.
Every now and then, someone comes up and says to me that they admire the fact that I have broken some of the patterns or they comment on our children being polite, kind, respectful.
So, when I find myself doubting about myself, I think about all these people and their comments, and I pat myself on the back. It is a gentle reminder that despite the challenges, I did something right. It is a nice feeling to be recognized by someone.
My children are my pride, joy, and happiness. When it came to household chores, I did my share plus husband’s so that he could spend more time with them, with us. His job dictates a demanding schedule, long hours, shift work, nights, weekends. So, while he did that one job which paid our bills, I did many; they went unnoticed as nobody paid me. I managed our household with an iron fist, there was no room for error. I was never a "cool mom", but I was "gets it all done, makes it happen mom". We had a strict schedule and we followed that schedule.
In the end, I had juggled so many schedules that I have become a master schedule juggler. I wish I got paid for that job. In the midst of all the chaos, I believed that I had perfected an eye roll that kept them in line for years, I lived under the impression that it was that look that made them behave, not get into trouble. Not too long ago, when the children were home for fall break with a friend of theirs, and I was bragging about my infamous perfected look, my middle child said, "look, what look? I do not remember any looks. " I was heartbroken. They could have let me live in my bubble and at least let me have my look. It was that look friends, "The look."
For years, I had
believed that my look had maintained order. But in reality, it was just my
presence, the love and having the consistency that had made the difference.
So, today's moral: whether you have practiced and perfected that “ look" or not, do the
best you can, and things will fall into place. As I reflect on my journey as a
mother, I find peace in knowing that despite all the challenges I faced, I gave my all to my job as a mom. And perhaps, just perhaps, in the end, that is all that mattered.
“Don’t forget while you are doubting yourself, there is
always someone else who is admiring your strength.” Kristen Butler
Always watching their every move
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