Celebrating 25 years of motherhood, day 5 - what's for dinner?

Day 5, the never ending dilemma of what's for dinner!!  

Cooking or figuring out what is for dinner has never been my forte, I considered that my major flaw. I have never enjoyed cooking. It was always more of a chore, do it and get it over with. 

Though I came from a background where cooking was almost always a woman’s job, I did not learn to cook until I moved here. Mom was always there to figure out dinners, it was not my worry.

When I became a mom, it was assumed that I too would in turn love to cook because I am a woman and a mom. I hated being in the kitchen more because of this gender bias than anything else. But I was the default parent, and it was my job. Husband worked crazy hours and long shifts, so he ever making anything or even figuring out what was going to be for dinner was out of the question. In fact, I always packed lunch or dinner for him depending upon what shift he was working, I still do.

 In my case, there was no escaping the kitchen. I packed their every school lunch. They did not mind taking the same thing every day but when it came to figuring out dinners? I miss my mother so much.

Somehow, I survived that whole ordeal of,"what’s for dinner?", of putting food on the table. And when it came to feeding them nutritious meals, I did not fail. I learnt; I may have used some short cuts, but I tried to make as many nutritional meals as I could. I do not follow recipes, but I do make dishes that are edible. Yeah me! I may have used the sauce from the jar, but I did boil the pasta and some nights we may have had pancakes for dinner, but they were made by me at home. I did not then, and I do not now enjoy cooking.

So, if you are one of those moms who is struggling to figure out what is for dinner every night, I hear you, loud and clear. I do not have any words of wisdom but these; hang in there. It does not get better; you will always miss your mother. But in the end, it was not about fancy, gourmet meals. It was eating dinner together as a family, which we always did. It was about coming together as a family, catching up with each other at the end of our day. The children later told me that they did not care what was on the table, as long as there was something on the table and they appreciated me being present at every dinner.

 In the meanwhile, both of my sons have learnt to help in the kitchen, cooking, doing the dishes, no more gender bias.

Here is a link to  my blog I posted several years ago. For your amusement. https://www.rekhasrambling.com/2015/12/american-christmas-dinner.html

And another one about what makes me happy, https://www.rekhasrambling.com/2024/03/international-day-of-happiness.html

“Being a parent is like jumping out of a plane with a bunch of people who do not know how to open their chutes, so you go fly around doing it for them… Then you hit the ground, but you do not die. You get your butt up and cook dinner.” -Unknown.