Rekha's Ramblings

  When I first moved to the USA from a tropical country, it was the end of April, daylight savings had already begun, and the days were long.  It would still be light outside, almost until 9 PM. It was something new to me. Every now and then my collogues would say, “oh, it’s going to be a beautiful day today.”  Back then, I didn’t understand what they meant by that phrase. I grew up in India where nearly every day was a sunny day except of course during the four months of the monsoon.  I failed to understand their excitement about a “day.” It was a day. What was the big deal? There was no Google then to ask any questions.  I had to take each day as it came. I had no idea what the weather pattern was going to be like, what to expect. The naïve me had not even ever heard of such a thing as “daylight savings.” And boy, come November, was I going to be surprised!!! By then, they had started talking about the end of daylight savings and how we were going to gain an...

November is the month of Thanksgiving.  One of my friends shared this "30 days of Gratitude challenge " with me a few years ago and today's challenge is "Growth".  The dictionary defines “growth” as the process of increasing in physical size, amount, value, or importance. In other words, it’s not just about getting physically taller but also growing your values, what matters to you, what grows your self-confidence.  In my opinion, Growth is based on your environment, the challenges you face. Some people thrive and become a better version of themselves when put under pressure, some not so. It also depends on how willing you are to learn, to get out of your box, to adapt to the situation, your circumstances.  My personal growth has always been through introspection, how I can be a better person than I was yesterday. It’s a journey, I am still learning.  There are many who continue to inspire me daily. I know my weaknesses, my flaws, my strengths, and I am trying t...

 I was talking to someone the other day; they are new on our block where friendships are already formed. The community is small, it is hard to get a breakthrough. They were asking me how I did it. I seem to have a lot of friends. How did I get that breakthrough? I have had a unique journey when it comes to friendship and being a part of a circle.  First, I am a very straightforward person and what I say is not always pleasant, in fact, most times it is offensive and hurtful to someone who does not know me.  Secondly, I am blessed by three siblings who to this date are my best friends and hence, I did not have the need to have more friends beyond them until I went to college. My college class size was extremely small, and friendships were formed automatically.  But as life progressed, when I moved away to the USA, every day was a new challenge. It became even more difficult when I became a parent. Balancing work, being a parent to three children (including a set of tw...

  Writing has always had a special place in my heart and its roots go way back to my childhood, to my father, my inspiration.  My father has kept a journal, a daily diary since he was, I believe 20 years old, sort of chronicles, at first of his life and then our lives. He would write down all he did every day and along with that, he would also write down community happenings, a little note of news, local, nationwide and or global events which occurred on that day.  He has a record of everything and anything that happened in our tiny community where I grew up and where record keeping was almost nonexistent. A tiny catholic rural community in India. He meticulously noted birthdays, anniversaries, and even deaths, along with details of dignitaries, clergy coming and going. He was a walking encyclopedia of our community's history.  He is well known in the community partly for that reason, as a historian, their source of information. They come looking for him when they ne...

 Writing has always held a special place in my heart. I find the act of putting thoughts and emotions into words truly liberating. But except for posting a little here and there on Facebook, I didn’t publish much. One of the reasons I hesitated to publish my writings was the fear of judgment and criticism.   So, you may ask, why now? Firstly, Now, I have come to realize that perfection is not my goal, authenticity is. Secondly, I was inspired. For years, I kept my writings hidden, unsure if they were ready to be seen. But encouraged by my sister’s gentle words and moved by a friend’s successful blog, I finally understood it’s never too late to begin. This blog will be my platform to share my unfiltered ramblings—without worrying about who reads them or what they think.  As the Hindi saying goes:  " कल करे सो आज कर , आज करे सो अब " ( Do tomorrow’s work today, and today’s work now. ) So, without further delay, I embark on this writing journey with a...

This is what was reflected through the windows of a local gym. Needless to say, I made it there but did not go inside today. I stood there and soaked it all in. Then walked around the neighborhood and soaked it all in even more. And while I was doing that, my daughter called to show me the fall from her window, at her college campus. Then my son texted me pictures of what he was looking at, fall from his viewpoint at his campus. I'm proud of myself today that I paused and taught them too, to pause and to appreciate little things in life. I hope you can pause, take a moment to appreciate little things around you. 

  Not too long ago, someone I deeply care about was going through a rough phase, feelings of loneliness and didn't know what to do, how to cope with it. Of course, we talked about seeing a therapist, counseling. While we were on the subject, he said “what do you know about loneliness, you always seem happy, I see all your pictures, you are always busy doing something. You are always smiling and happy." Hmmm, long pause.... What do I know about loneliness??? I know  plenty about being lonely, especially now, recent empty nester. My world revolved around my children and their activities. Now that they are gone, all the running around is gone. Sometimes it's very rough, especially on a weekend when everyone else seems to be busy but I am not. I wish I could show you how often I was sad and lonely....  I go through those days of loneliness, a lot. It was very rough and difficult at first. Now, I try to not be "alone" when I am lonely. I force myself to go out, be w...

  They said invoke the child within, go for a walk, nature can heal, nature is the best therapy. Until I got there, I mean at that stage of a woman's life, I had no idea, I am sure every woman who is there now is saying the same. I have laughed, mocked the women who were there and my sincere apologies to them. Until I got there, I thought everything was exaggerated, who puts their head in the freezer? And I am a healthcare professional, but it was all a hearsay until I myself was there. I failed to understand the gravity of this thing called MENOPAUSE. That is me now. I am that woman, my whole-body hurts, my joints ache, my head is in the freezer, a lot. And sleep, what is that??? I once took pride in my ability to remember things. But what is that now?? That is part of the reason everything gets posted on Facebook, it is sort of my memory book. I feel like I am a different person, I do not recognize myself in the mirror. But surprisingly when you reach that stage, ...

 October is a FALL month. October is also "Marching Band" month. If you ever had a child in the school/ college band, you would know what I am talking about. The school Marching Bands all over the country are busy this month with competitions and playing at school football games. Marching Band is not considered a sport and hence it does not get the recognition it deserves unlike a lot of fall sports. I am a self-proclaimed Band Mom, inside out. All three of my children participated in the school band and two of them continued to their university band. Ya, proud mom.  After School activities were all new to me. I did not have access to any extracurricular activities when and where I grew up. When my first born was in eighth grade, I saw his future high school band perform at a community event and it was instant love; love at first sight. So, when he joined his high school marching band as a first-year student, and even though I had two elementary grade children at that time,...

A day out with girlfriends = giggles, goofing and good times. Every woman should be able to experience this pure, unadulterated joy every now and then. I did not then, I was busy raising my kids but looking forward to it now. Better late than never. Today is  World Mental Health Day  . It is easy to lose yourself in the rut, in the grind. I grew up with the phrase "ask and you shall receive." You oversee your own wellbeing, and I have learnt that one must ask, one must find out the resources available to them. It can be simple things like walking outside, visiting a local library or watching something you like or listening to the music you like. In this case, I had to ask my friends if I could join them and glad, I did. We had such a wonderful time that I am still smiling thinking about it. Hope you can figure out what it is that makes you happy, brings you joy. My ramblings on this World Mental Health Day!!    

  Very recently visited this place, Devil's bridge, as its name suggests, it was a strenuous hike, towards the end, it was very rough, bear climbing. I'm afraid of heights and almost gave up.  My husband went up to the bridge while I waited down, the last 1/10th of the way away. He came back down with some pictures as he knows it's the pictures that motivate me and that is why I had picked the hike to begin with. He held my hand and guided me all the way up and back down again.  We were not rushed; we took our time, and he made sure that I got to see what I wanted to see. The breathtaking vista it offered was priceless and worth it.  And folks, that's what it was all about, some motivation, some guidance, some hand holding.  Sometimes that's what we need. That's exactly what he did for me. Hope you have one such person in your life. My ramblings on a Monday morning! Have a great day and a great week ahead.  

  “In the event of a sudden drop in pressure, an oxygen mask will drop from above. Secure your own mask first before assisting others.” The first time I heard this, I was flying for the first time in my life on an international flight from Mumbai to Atlanta via London. I was so excited to go to America on my own that I did not really pay that much attention to this routine preflight announcement. Since I had flown to America, it also meant flying back, again, several times to go home. I heard the same announcement during all those trips but at that point, they were still some words, their true meaning still had not registered.  Then came another first time of my life, this time it was flying with my first born, for the first time. By this time, I was not as excited about flying, the novelty had completely worn off. Now I am only concerned about the safety of my baby, he is sitting in my lap, one year old. Then they make the above preflight announcement, in several diffe...

  I very recently started listening to podcasts. One of them is “wiser than me” hosted by Julia Dreyfus. One of the questions she routinely asks all her guests is, “do you have a self-care routine, do you mediate, yoga, what do you do?”  I don’t remember exactly who her guest was this time, but I was simply fascinated by their answer. It was unlike any one I had heard before, but I was very happy to hear it, it deeply resonated with my own answer, one very dear to my heart. This guest said they liked to read before bedtime, that is their self-care routine and not only that, their favorite genre is  reading "mystery” novels, that is their escape from reality.  OMG!! I was surprised to hear that answer. In today’s world, self-care is often associated with mediation, yoga, going to a spa, getting a massage, exercise and those are not necessarily bad things, they have their own benefits, and I am happy if they work for you. But they have never been my things. My self-car...

  I very recently started listening to podcasts, I do not know why I waited this long. I was stubborn but that is not important right now.  I finally started listening to them and I have been listening to this particular podcast, “Wiser than ME” hosted by none other than the iconic Julia Louis Dreyfus. In these podcasts, she interviews a different accomplished woman who is older than her and therefore wiser, she takes us through their journey, how they became wiser and concludes the podcast by calling her mom and they discuss the details of the podcast.  I got hooked on to it immediately, undoubtedly for all the wisdom from all these wise women but also because of the way each podcast ended. Julia and her mom have a loving chat about the host, the things they talked about, they reminisce about her childhood amongst other things; and it was these conversations that sold this podcast to me.  I love hearing their conversations, the mother-daughter bond, their loving rel...

 ASK and YOU SHALL RECEIVE!    This phrase was a recurring theme during my upbringing. I grew up in a closed catholic community in a tiny rural community outside of Mumbai. As a 3–4-year-old little girl, I was merely repeating what the adults were saying, asking for some sort of forgiveness for our sins, not knowing its implications. Little did I know that this phrase would be my lifeline, the biggest tool in my tool belt later in my life.   The then little girl in me had taken this phrase for its literal meaning. I had started asking, mostly for a bigger share of food, a bigger portion of a single candy bar which my grandmother had to divide into four.  But when I started going to school at the age of 4, my father, the smartest and the wisest person I knew at that time, an enormous source of wisdom, guidance not only for me   or my family but for my entire village, emphasized on this belief, “ask and you shall receive.” He then went on explaining what ...

 I very recently started listening to podcasts, in fact started listening to one just this week, it was a friendly suggestion by the AI of the music app I use; and heard one today with a very interesting message, the "power of silence", how it can convey what you want to say effectively, sometimes even more so than your words can.  I am not the silent type of a person, I am usually loud, I will butt in, I will interrupt, I want to be heard (why that is so is a whole different story, for another time). And while I may be loud, I am not stubborn. There is always room for learning , I am always trying to be a better version of me than I was yesterday.  I come from the land of Buddha, people who were enlightened by staying silent. So, now I need to learn how to achieve this new skill. How hard can this be?   And as I say this out loudly and narrate the details of this podcast to my family, they are rolling their eyes, like that is ever going to happen. ....  Bu...

As I sit here and look out my window, I see my little patch of happiness; the gladioli in my little patch of garden are blooming. They are my pride, my joy, and my happiness. I can't help but reflect on our journey together. An interesting story about the pandemic. I planted these gladioli bulbs during the pandemic. In the beginning, everyone around me was busy cooking, gardening, knitting; I am not into any of these. I don't have much of a green thumb; in the past I have planted a few things, but they ended up dying. So, this time I wasn't expecting anything, I found the bulbs on sale at a local home and garden store. I planted them as an experiment, as a challenge to myself. I planted them in mid-April and forgot all about them. However, to mine and everyone else's surprise, they thrived and started blooming in early parts of July, one after the other, in different colors. Seeing those colorful flowers take over my yard was like therapy, happiness at its source, t...

  When the pandemic hit and we were forced into a lockdown , the anxiety and stress levels were extremely high given the fact that my husband and I are both healthcare professionals.  We have three children; I had been working part time until then but decided to quit my job altogether not knowing what was ahead of us. It then meant lots of free time at hand; I am not much into cooking, sewing, gardening and I had to find something to keep my mind occupied. During the lockdown, we were allowed to walk outside, of course observing social  distancing. Up until this time, I was not much into any type of exercising . Hence, decided to challenge myself with walking, with a daily goal of 10,000 steps. The Samsung health app was already on my phone but had never paid much attention to it until now. I started walking in our neighborhood, in and around where we live. The first week was very rough, panting, knees hurting, barely making it to  even my halfway mark. But then, mag...